Tolly’s getting a wheelchair

So I’ve been crying non-stop these past few days. I’m hugely pissed at the vets, my heart is broken for Toller, and I knew that after the costs of her treatment thus far, we couldn’t afford £1500-2500 to amputate her leg.

So it was time to think up an alternative to improve her life.

And we discovered doggy wheelchairs!

For now we have ordered an extremely basic, standard (eg. not custom fit) front-wheeled cart that cost £70, and looks like this:

We’ll be trying that out whilst we wait to sort something for a custom cart. It’s due to arrive early next month.

Custom wheelchairs are incredibly expensive. We’re looking at £300-400 once we factor in custom builds and postage, especially as the one I keep getting directed to is based in America! If anyone wants to share or donate to Toller’s Go Fund Me, please do 🙂

Help get Tolly walking and wheeling

Why a wheelchair?

So basically where the vet has left us now, according to them, Tolly is fully healed. They don’t even want to see her again unless “we’re concerned”…uh yeah, after seeing her walk yesterday I’m fucking concerned!!!!!

What happened to her making a full recovery and the injury not even being visible?! What happened to her being able to go on walks like a normal dog?? Now you’re saying that’s not going to happen?!

At this point Spud has endured eight weeks of crate rest, and guys that is just bullshit 😦

She’s a completely different dog to before the accident; she’s miserable, she gets enjoyment from so little, and she’s anxious. It’s BULLSHIT. I’m so annoyed because I wanted to amputate that leg, but the vets persuaded me not to, they said it’d be fine…and it’s not.

With a wheelchair, she will be able to BE A DOG. She can run and explore immediately, no rehab, no worries about making her leg worse…the misery of crate rest will be over, and it’ll be SUCH an improvement on the vets proposed life of carrying and such limited walking.

I know she could have been happy as a tripawd, but with a wheelchair she can be a dog RIGHT NOW. No more rest, no more procedures. So that’s the way we’re going.

I’m exhausted and so stressed by all this, but I feel like we might have found a way to make my baby girl happy. Fingers crossed…

Tolly update, crate rest is over!

Keeping it short because I’ve been horribly ill from the moment I got up today.

Toller finally had her vet appt this afternoon and we got the best news ever, crate rest is over!

The vet said that Toller has recovered faster than any of them could have anticipated, and even from her vet appt a few weeks ago Toller has made more progress than expected. The vet said that Toller can now be put on the ground in the house for several minute bursts, then held for a while, and put down again.

Obviously she’s not to run madly or jump on and off furniture, but this will be huge for her 🙂

It goes without saying we are very happy. Can’t wait until I’m well enough to play and interact with her on the floor.


Oh and here is a cute video from yesterday, I think…we discovered she loves the spray bottle!!

A ‘feel better’ walk

Awful day.

Finally managed to get out with the girls early evening (Toller being carried by my partner of course). Despite it being a sunny day the walk was really enjoyable, and I only had one seizure. Sasha alerted perfectly, and we sat out the way to recover – easy!

Had a really nice time…also if this isn’t the cutest photo ever, I don’t know what is. I love my partner so much 🙂


My girls and my love!


We found a string of dead moles, which was grim. There are so many hunters in this area.


Beautiful view

For anybody who hasn’t seen on IG, Toller’s vet appt was cancelled this week and pushed back until next Wednesday.

At this point I’m completely sick of our vets. From them constantly getting her name wrong and never finding her on the system (they have her registered as ‘Polly’, we’ve told them half a dozen times to change it…) to the disgraceful way they treated Toller and all the misinformation and lack of information at the time of her accident, I’m done.

Why am I paying these guys so much to look at her, when they’re getting everything wrong, don’t have a clue on her prognosis, and can’t even get her name right?! Hmmm…

Throwback to sunny days

What do you get when you mix insomnia, hypomania, seizures and a cold?

Me -_-

My partner gave me a cold he had…WHO GETS A COLD IN SPRING?! Haha, ugh!

The weather has turned from 5 days of glorious sunshine, to now we’re on day 4 of constant rain. If I post these beautiful photos from when it was sunny, I’m thinking it will tempt the sun to return. Well, that and I feel too yucky to post anything else XD

Although Charley never looked ‘fat’, he was overweight when he arrived here, and he’s lost a fair bit of chub in the few months we’ve had him. He’s a lean mean ball-fetching machine now! Who said you need walks to keep a dog fit?!

When he first arrived:

Birds’ eye view now:

And the best I could find from before:

His height seems to have shrunk this past month too…wait, what do you mean Sasha’s grown? WHY IS SHE STILL GROWING?! Will she never stop?? XD

Possibly my favourite-est photo of all time 🙂 ❤



Games in the sun. The last pic, yes, Sasha is biting his arse. This is something she does when Charley is playing fetch XD

I bloody love his smile. And his eyes. And his lovely orangey head XD




Smiley sun-Sasha is literally the cutest thing ever


This is my most favourite Sasha photo!!





Omg, these two 🙂


An angry rant

Today had a really nice few hours where we sat in the garden and had such a nice time as a family, but there have been huge periods of time lost due to seizures and seizure rage.

I just woke up from a 2.5 hour nap, because apparently my body is useless atm and needs a 2.5 hour nap every day, and the seizure rage and seizures have returned.

I can’t fucking stand these seizures.

My worst auras result in extreme rage, where I want to harm those I love or at least lash out at them verbally, or where all of a sudden I just feel completely hopeless, depressed and done with everything. How can a seizure immediately switch from me doing fine, to wanting to scream at my partner or kill myself?!

These feelings seem organic to me, even if me and my partner both know they are entirely caused by incoming seizures, it doesn’t help at all because they FEEL real and are inside me.

Another thing I hate is that before, during, or even after some seizures, I feel intensely hungry. It doesn’t matter if I ate a big meal just half an hour ago, I feel STARVING!! This is extremely fucking depressing, because either I eat when I don’t really need to, and obviously this will affect my weight as it happens a few times a day, or I have to try and ignore a hunger so strong it reduces me to frustrated tears.

Again, I know it’s not a ‘real’ hunger, but it doesn’t help in the slightest.

My plan for this blog was to post some beautiful photos of Charley and Sasha in the garden, taken today. But I’m too wound up and frustrated for that, so I’ve moaned and whined instead.

I. hate. seizures -__-

If you made it through this, enjoy a video of Toller deciding she loves red pepper…yesterday she snubbed dog treats, kibble, hot dog and a knuckle bone, but absolutely loved red pepper 🙂

Toller update – 2.5 weeks crate rest

I come bearing fantastic news…Spudder is doing GREAT 😀

She has done 2.5 weeks of crate rest (so this counts as week 3) and she has barely a limp!!!!

This is obviously more than we could EVER have hoped for, as the first two vets we saw said that even once fully recovered she would be lame, walking would hurt her etc.

The rewiring surgery that they pushed (hell, they were still pushing it as being crucial and trying to get us to put Tolly through it TWO DAYS AGO!) was only supposed to result in a little less lameness, and Tolly was still supposed to have a hugely significant limp.

Well guys, LOOK AT HER! 🙂

The only time she walks at all is to go to the toilet, as shown. Other than that she is crated (you may notice she is wearing her cone despite no splint, that is so she can’t turn around and move much in her crate!) or being held. And that’s it.

I’m so, SO, *so* pleased she is doing so well 😀 😀 😀

Collie & Cattle Dog & Lab, oh my!

I don’t remember how much I’ve really, properly talked about Charley since he arrived…so this is a Charley post!

Charley was a bit of a state when he arrived.

He played like a crazy dog (we thought he was Collie x Lab, and he played like a Husky / Australian Cattle Dog, it was insane to watch!), he was mental around cars, he pulled like a steam train, he was crazy-obsessed with fetch, and he didn’t understand to potty outdoors.

Within the first day we realised he almost definitely had some Australian Cattle Dog in him, in part because of his looks but also due to his behaviour. A couple of weeks later and the online checker (obviously very inaccurate, but still haha!) agreed XD

He got very excited around visitors (our friend comes over weekly and my parents visited) and couldn’t settle even if they were here several hours, and thanks to his behaviour on lead and around cars he was A NIGHTMARE to walk.

Fast forward a month and a half and this little crazy dude has wormed his way into our hearts 😉


Fetch is being used as a way to work on impulse control, and to exercise him as he no longer goes on walks. He now knows over ten cues, him and Sasha have got a really beautiful play style, and we’re directing his extreme herding instincts into flirt pole fun.

He’s gotten less intense with his loving (before he would force his face into yours, fall against or on top of you etc) and is learning to settle around the house. He shares toys brilliantly, has gotten used to Trip-bun who recently moved from our spare room to our living room, and now that he doesn’t have walks we’ve noticed he is much happier and calmer in general.

(big pups doing a down stay in front of Trip)

A huge example of how much calmer zero walks has made him, is with people coming over. Our friend was here for about 4 hours yesterday; Charley said hello politely, played fetch, and settled. That was all he did. A few weeks back this would have been unimaginable!

Kasper, of course, hates Charley. But Kasper hates everyone other than Tolly, and he only just tolerates her XD

We have an easy system rotating Kasper between free roaming in the kitchen, the entirety of upstairs, and the living room when the other pups are elsewhere. Charley is the only dog (currently) that would actively fight back with Kasper…before it would just be Kasper snarking and the other dog getting scared.

You might think with no walks, Charley is bouncing off the walls…he is a medium energy dog, and only 7 months old, but SO EASY to manage 🙂

We start the day with garden fun to toilet, then he plays with Sasha. We have a nice long game of indoor fetch with some training mixed in, then he usually settles with a non-edible chew…buffalo horn, antler, Nylabone etc.

After that he either falls asleep around the house or in his crate. Once awake we’ll do some training or scent work with kibble, play some more fetch, and he’ll chew himself to sleep again. Add a few more play sessions with Sasha and him being left if we go out, and that’s it…incredibly easy on all 🙂

Some photos. Yesterday his favourite toy was mysteriously torn apart. Red Alien was only with us for about a week, but he was Charley’s all-time favourite toy, and quickly became crusty and spitty from all the love…RIP Red Alien!!

Charley has a new Envy collar. He looks so handsome in it ^__^


He had milk on his face in this photo…my bf accidentally knocked over a pint of milk and it was dripping into Charley’s crate, Charley realised this and ran in to try catch the drops XD