The last day

Today is the last day I am supposed to take the sedative. I can’t wait.

My partner read online that the 10mg the GP told me to take (whenever I was really bad I was to take 10mg, and my partner could give me 10mg up to four times a day) is the highest dose you should take in one sitting, and it should only be taken by people who have a tolerance and are used to the med.

Wow thanks Doctor, no wonder I was sat staring into space drooling *sigh*

We missed a phone call today (possibly from the mental health nurse, although it was a different number). Our sleep is really messed up because this drug just knocks me out, so I sleep for four hours, am awake for a few, and then it’s med time again…I spent so long trying to sort my sleep out before all this, finally managed it, and now this med has destroyed it 😦

Anyway we missed the call ‘cos we were asleep, and my partner tried to call back as soon as he saw it. The number cannot be called, they can call you but you can’t call them. So we just have to wait until they try again now…we got the call before lunch and they didn’t try again today *sigh*

I am tired. I am sad. I am numb.

Still getting all the psychosis symptoms, but the terror is dulled. I am dulled.

I want off this.


10 thoughts on “The last day

    • Thank you again Maureen πŸ™‚ Yeah, the octopus wasn’t as time consuming as I thought…because the head bits were so tiny I thought it would take hours, but it progressed surprisingly quickly. I love watching the colouring come along, and staring at the page means I don’t realise how woozy my head is haha!

    • Totally! They want to extend the woozy med longer, and I just want off!! Maybe I can cut the pills into smaller pieces…my partner’s been giving me 1/4 of a small pill and they’re already hard to cut to that size! πŸ˜›

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