Doped up, zonked out

I still have more Raiden reviews coming but this is a more relaxed post.

Last Friday was the worst ever. My partner phoned the GP for an appointment, but there was a 4 week wait. He asked for the soonest urgent appt & was given a telephone appointment 5 days away.

Later he phoned NHS 111 & told them we were in a crisis, & they said to phone our GP surgery back and tell them that 111 said they need to give us a physical appt within 24 hours.

The first Dr my partner spoke to was disgusting – they told him to take me to A&E and get me sectioned…

My partner phoned the surgery again & got me an actual appt with a different GP. The Dr we saw was still horrible & didn’t speak directly to me once. Just asked my partner questions beginning with “Is she”.

I now have sedatives to knock me out until the NHS finally gives me an appt with someone who can prescribe meds that will actually help.

The dose they gave me was ridiculous. I started yesterday lunchtime & spent the day sitting in a chair too numb and detached from the world to do anything…eight hours colouring & nothing else. I couldn’t even talk properly.

Today we halved the dose. I’m foggy and slow and can’t think straight, but I can walk and talk. It’s an improvement.

I’ve done more colouring, me and my partner played with play doh, and I even got to take Kasper and Rey for a walk.

I am very lucky to have my partner. A partner who will stick by me when I am at my worst. A partner who loves me no matter what. A partner who will fight for me and repeatedly phone people to try get me the help I need. A partner who has no problem colouring, playing with play doh, and doing any activity I find soothing so I’m not doing it alone. I love him so much.

My parents bought me this colouring book and, although this doesn’t look like I actually coloured much, this page took about six hours to colour in…the leaves took so long!

This one only took an hour. The gold, bronze and silver are weird Sharpie glitter-type pens, and when you colour with them it’s like using nail varnish…they don’t look that good, but it’s too much fun using them so I colour with them all the time!

I’m thrilled with how the next one turned out. I wanted to colour the fruit with normal colours on the outside and then have them all zingy and psychedelic on the inside. It worked well 🙂

And I’m just starting this octopus / squid (looks like a cross between the two!). Some of the spaces to colour in this one are so tiny that even my fine point pens won’t manage it!

And of course our wonderful play doh creations…I made a squid 🙂


And my partner made a deer and a self portrait haha ❤

I managed to clean the quail bathing area out today as well, and swapped their cat litter tray for a smaller but deeper plastic storage box. Funny thing is we only saw them bathe in the litter box once, yet as soon as I put the tub in they went crazy, throwing sand everywhere! Too cute.

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And that’s it. I’m exhausted now; my partner is helping me write this blog and then I’ll go back to colouring until bed.

I’m on the dopey med for another 3+ days, but we might try reduce the dose more or taper it off…I don’t know.

Normal blogging will hopefully resume soon 🙂



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